Paint the Town or My A…

img_7488I always love a good paint job.  A fresh coat of paint can do wonders in making the old look new, changing a mood, or making a place look more welcoming.  Welcoming is exactly what it was in my case!  I will allow you to have a good laugh at my expense.

I had a laugh at my expense.  Giving myself plenty of time to get to an appointment today on time, I decided to take a little walk through the local park and enjoy some mindful moments to myself.  I find this welcoming bright green ledge which looked so inviting for me to sit on and think and no signs or indication it had just been painted (missing the fresh glossy look you have with fresh paint).  Listening to my music, this guy gets in my face and is motioning me to move.  As I pull my headphones down, I ask kya (what).  He tells me not to sit the paint is wet.  As I look at him confused I place my hand down on the ledge and find my hand sticking to it, immediately I stood up doing the half turn to place my eyes on my backside to access the damage before anyone else.  img_7507

But it was too late.  A crowd of onlookers all stood there gawking at my now freshly colored green backside which clearly stated ‘I SAT IN PAINT’.  “Signs, where are the signs?” I asked in panic.  “No signs mam.” As I looked around, I met eyes with three more victims.  Mine was the worst.  My appointment was in thirty minutes and I had a green colored ass.  I can only imagine walking into the office and hearing, “Mam, please take a seat,” as I refused to place my green backside on their upholstery.  All I could do was shake my head and laugh.  There was no solution to this…or was there…

I saw a billboard which was about my height and I walked up to it, bent over and pressed my backside right up to it.  I was hoping for the sponge blotting affect as I attempting to get off as much paint off my jeans as possible.  With spectators laughing, all I could do was laugh with them.  It worked too.

At that point all I could think about was how obvious the green paint was on me and how people already stare at me enough. Last thing I wanted was for them staring at my backside and me knowing they were staring at it.  Then with a laugh I decided the only way to salvage this situation was to put it all over my jeans.  Maybe if I had it all over me, then perhaps it would look like a fashionable thing to do or at least it was meant to be there.  I started pressing my legs in every angle I could get into and get paint all over my jeans.

Of course this caused for more laughter and a larger crowd.  But what could I do?  I had ruined an expensive pair of jeans, had an appointment to go to and I needed to make the best of the situation. They didn’t turn out so bad after all, and the end I was reminded of two very good lessons in life: 1. It’s important to be able to laugh at yourself.  2. Always watch where you put your ass.




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